Tough Morning and Then Church

This morning was the first time Christian did not want to go to daycare.  He cried when it was time to put on his coat, kept pushing it away and hugging me.  I felt SO sad!  He calmed down, was his usual quiet self in the car looking at everything out the window.  I point out things as I drive and tell him what they are.  He usually just looks at me and then the thing, but lately he has been repeating me.  This morning he didn't make a peep.  When I closed the door once we were inside the daycare, he pushed at it, said "open" and started crying.  I wanted to cry too :(   The daycare lady and I distracted him and then I slipped out.  I felt so bad, like I was abandoning him, which I know isn't true, but it was so hard leaving him when he was upset.

He was fine when I left and the daycare lady told me he didn't cry and started playing with the kids and toys.  He was happy to see me when I picked him up tonight.  That's the best feeling in the world, having your child run to you with that huge smile and jump into your arms.  I have to cherish those moments because I know they will pass too soon.

We attending mass tonight for Ash Wednesday which was challenging. Christian was whiny and uncooperative after daycare so I knew church wasn't going to be easy. The first 15 minutes were exhausting; he wanted up, he wanted down, he wanted out of the pew, he wanted under the pew, he chattered, he whined, on and on and on.  Finally he became interested in the two junior high aged kids behind us, was quiet and just watched them while I held him. Now those two kids were not acting appropriately during mass for their age, but they were keeping him "entertained" so it worked for me (I hope lightening doesn't stike me). While messing around he slipped on the kneeler and bumped his back on the edge. A small cry came out, followed by the deep breath. Yes you know what comes next.  I quickly tried to get out of the pew, out the door into the vestibule before the loud cry erupted.  I made it, well halfway.  I made it out the door but the door was still closing, so the cry was still heard. Thankfully he calmed down immediately so back in we went.  After that he was fairly quiet.  Now I must say there were two other kids who were louder for longer than Christian was. :)

Up to the front we go to receive the ashes, which I was convinced would be the catalyst for a major meltdown, due to him being tired and not yet too fond of strangers, especially ones that put black stuff on your head.  While I held Christian, the lady put ashes on my head first, while he watched intently. Then she slowly put some on his head, he held still and didn't cry!!!  He wrinkled up his face some, I'm sure due to the excess ash falling down his nose (I do the same thing).  As I walked back to our pew (in the very back) his eyes darted from one person to another, then back to my forehead, trying to figure it all out.  I was surprised that he didn't touch his forehead or mine and try to wipe it off. He is so finicky about his hands being dirty that I thought that would be the first thing he would do, but he didn't.  All in all, due to the fact that mass was after daycare and he was tired, my little bug did good at church this time :)

Tomorrow is day 3 of the Inchworms class, hopefully it will continue to be progressively better.  Stay tuned...
~Amy